Anyway, check this out and be amazed by the talent: Drawing-a-Day
As for my crap, I’ll be turning on the fan and seeing where it hits:
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
March 2010
1. “Well, you were right to say I was a bit sweaty, or a lot, to be honest.”
- source: online conversation with a friend about a show we attended the previous Saturday
2. Pardon my ignorance, but when you were at the dog training facility, did you learn any new tricks?
- source: wicked burn on a friend on Twitter
3. Perhaps I should stop using words like “henceforth” at work.
source: response to my stupid job, duh
4. Time flew by like it always did, with no one the wiser that it had skimmed straight past the most important bits.
source: specifically written off-the-cuff for the sentence project
5. “I like the smart one.”
source: comment made to a friend on which of her kids I like best (jokingly, they are both awesome)
6. “Thanks for taking that bullet for me.”
source: said to the friend from #5, but I forget why she told me to write it down, as I was drunk.
7. Thank goodness for awesome friends who seem to tolerate my drunken blatherings!
source – thanking my lucky stars my friends put up with me
8. The cat was demanding laser beams, and though I explained to her that lasers are dangerous, she could not be convinced of anything but how much she wanted to play the game.
source – my Moofy is the sweetest little cat ever
9. Today I discovered that “chocolate cheese” apparently comes out of the backside of the goat.
source – a disappointing discovery at the local Kroger Marketplace
10. I might have to murder the dog if he pisses on my couch one more time.
source – real life, yo, seriously, that dog has issues
11. For all the ridiculous people in that room, it’s like, “How many clowns can you fit into a VW Beetle?”
source – mouthing off at work again
12. “You don’t have to tell me anything, you’re doing me a disservice if you don’t realize I’ve already figured it all out.”
source – what I said to my co-worker when she dept jumped on me, knowing full well she was doing it before she finally got the courage to confess
13. “Well at least we both committed crimes involving booze and an underage girls, and that makes us twinsies.”
source – said to a friend during a crazy night of drinking
14. What kind of present do you get a gal who spent half the night cleaning up after your drunk ass?
source – questions on etiquette and over-drinking
15. “We’re gonna be besties!”
source – in response to a co-worker (who said “We’ll be working closely together from now on.”)
16. I can’t understand when there’s no reason to the why.
source – a new poem!
17. We should build a franchise to exploit all things emo.
source – written for the sentence project
18. The traffic jam down Main Street was going to make Winchester Talbot late for work again.
source- written for 3-minute fiction
19. “I don’t know what this world is coming to; I just ate tapioca and liked it.”
source – I know tastes change, but what the hell?
20. “I just wrote a song about dinosaurs for a 2-year old.”
source – I really did that, it was the first song I ever wrote
21. “I like the new setup of the IT department at work, because there’s a little window, and I just wanna tap on the glass and make faces at them like they’re guinea pigs.”
source – something I shouldn’t have said in front of the company president (and 1/2 of the IT department)
22. “We can’t do business with dead people, since the law doesn’t exactly extend to the non-corporeal world.”
source – said to a co-worker when they admitted a customer passed away weeks ago
23. “That’s slicker than shit, but don’t ask me how I know that!”
source – said to the maintenance dude at work, who warned of a slippery floor
24. “How do you pasteurize lemon juice?”
source – question that came up after a weird work email
25. “I’m an emphysemic whore!”
source – said to a co-worker after a coughing fit (stupid bronchitis)
26. The knocking at the door sounded far too human to be a feline.
source – kitties is crazy
27. Nothing like having the rug pulled out from under you, to realize it was covering a portal into hell.
source – pessimism and yuckiness
28. Next time, I will plan out this entire project so that it doesn’t end up being a month-long post of stupid crap I said.
source – better intentions for next time
29. “Merry March,” Santa says, as he waves an American flag in one hand, and clutches greedily to a candy cane with the other.
source: a sarcastic comment about a neighbor’s Christmas decorations still being up in March
30. “There’s nothing like being outsourced to make a girl polish up her stupid resume.”
source – ugh, I loathe my place of employment
31. “Come on, and show them something they’ve never seen before!”
source: my advice to a friend about doing some kind of artistic expression